First dates can be pretty stressful for both parties. Typically, neither person knows the other one that well. The anxiety that arises from all of the different nightmare first date scenarios can make for a pretty tense encounter. With all of that in mind, the best first dates are the ones with atmospheres that are most conducive to relaxation.
Good: Meeting for a Drink
This is about the best thing you can do on a first date. It’s low-key and easy to cut the date short if it’s not going well. Additionally, a little alcohol can serve as a great social lubricant to ease the tension. Pick a bar with a relaxed atmosphere though. Lately, “trendy” places have been popping up that are a little pretentious. These “lounges” don’t really lend themselves to having the most relaxed atmosphere. A better choice is a laid-back place that has a patio where you could probably get away with wearing sandals if the weather was accomodating enough.
Bad: Going to Dinner
Sitting down for a meal with someone you barely know is stuffy and too personal. The whole point of a first date is to have a fun, relaxing time with one another. Eat a frozen meal before you go out and save the dinner date for down the road.
Good: Meeting up with Friends
There’s nothing wrong with a first date being an activity with a couple mutual friends. This provides for some flexibility. If you don’t hit it off, you can mask that by interacting more with the group. If things are going really well, you can always ditch the group for some one-on-one time.
Bad: Seeing a Movie
Seeing a movie makes for an awkward first date. You’re sitting quietly in the dark for two hours next to a stranger. Plus, people usually walk away from a movie in a drug-like haze for several minutes because of the movie’s emotional impact. None of this leads for much time to relax and get to know each other.
Bad: Anything Involving Competition
It might seem like a good idea to go bowling or miniature golfing on a first date, but this is ill advised. Dating is about coming together as a team to give each other what you want. Competition gets in the way of this. Even if each person entirely understands that it doesn’t matter who bowls better than who, there will still be some subconscious elements of competition that won’t help the date.
Good: Shopping
Asking a date to meet you at a mall isn’t such a bad idea. You can say something like, “well I really need to pick up some clothes, want to walk around the mall for a little bit with me and give me your opinion on how I look in that big purple sweater?” Shopping is a low-key date that allows for any outcome (good: “let’s go get a drink”, bad: “it was nice meeting you, ciao”).