We’ve all heard the cliche that “women only date guys who are assholes” or that “nice guys never get the girl”. These statements have mostly been propagated by “nice guys” who are bitter about losing out to some biker with tattoos for the affection of a lady’s heart. While their frustration is understandable, there’s an important lesson to be learned in these statements.
Women have made remarkable progress in our society over the last 100 years. The push to move away from a patriarchal societal structure has been very successful. The problem for all the “nice guys” out there, is that it has perhaps been too successful. To put it another way, the pendulum has swung to the point that some men are beginning to think it’s appropriate to express their “feminine side” or allow their emotions to run rampant.
While society has changed, the type of guy that women want has not changed that much from a fundamental standpoint. Since the beginning of humanity, women have always wanted charismatic, confident men with a good sense of humor. These traits are rooted in their instincts as being innately attractive. The modern day “beta-male” is a new element to society and it’s not something women find attractive from a general standpoint. Thousands of years ago, “beta-males” were not desired because their perceived weaknesses meant they were easy prey (ie: might literally be killed). That’s obviously not a concern anymore, but the instincts to avoid such men are remain to this day.
So how do you be an alpha-male? Luckily, it’s not hard. The #1 tip is to care about yourself more than you care about anyone else. This runs contrary to what some elements of society teach us. Many men were raised by two loving parents in which, frankly, the father was whipped and controlled by the woman. Additionally, our educational structure rewards kids who “fall in line” and do as they are told contrary to their own wishes. It sounds counter intuitive that you should care about yourself more than anyone else, but think about it for a second. Whose needs are more important than your own? Alpha-males realize this and live their lives following this principal. And guess what? The world rewards them for it! They have more money, more women, and more fun.
You might be thinking, “gee, if getting a girl means I have to be an asshole, then maybe I don’t want a girl.” But let me ask you this: since when is placing the priority on one’s own needs the characteristic of an “asshole”? The best thing nice guys of the world could do is stop being so damn nice! People don’t respect it when you’ll allow yourself to be walked on. Stand up for yourself. Develop an identity. Think for yourself and express your opinions. Disagree with people when your instinct is to do so. Be a leader. Laugh. Hell, get into a heated argument. Invite the world to join you on the wonderful ride that is your existence. When you master these things, the process of “getting girls” will take care of itself!